zoned out

Spending way too much time staring at standards. And while I know one should
rely on the standards to decide what to teach, my methods of teaching prof was right when he said that textbooks decide what's taught in different courses. So it'd be really great to have our curriculum. Or someone who knows what it is. Maybe even someone who could just tell us the sequence of math courses here. Because trying to find out what "Advanced Math" is supposed to be was a wild goose chase. I mean, yes our entire department is new. But shouldn't that be all the more reason from someone to be looking out to make sure we're on track with picking up where some teacher (however long ago) left off?

Looking through standards trying to come up with long term plans of study or whatever is kind of annoying. So here's a list of things from last week that make me look forward to this year.

• I'm not the only math teacher.
• I have a department chair (who's not me!).
• My chair came to this school because he really wanted to work with this community. Meaning he should be able to help me learn to understand the community.
• I have an aide. Who is from the community and knows students, staff, everyone. Beyond being friendly and someone I'm excited about working with, I'm also glad to have someone else who will be a resource for me in my adjustment to life here.
• New classroom! I get to break it in. (Hopefully not actually breaking anything.)
• The fact that the school did get the washer and dryer into our housing makes me more optimistic that I will have a laptop in my classroom. (Maybe it can download Geogbra. Even better if I can convince them to buy Geometer's Sketchpad.)

someday i will look back and know what's going on

It's interesting how I can't really get a straight story here. There's so much politics. Naturally people outside of the school warn me to stay away from the politics, but I don't really think that's possible. I just wish I knew more of the backstory on different situations. If I ask enough different people, I can triangulate decently. But I still don't know why the administration warned new staff not to attend tonight's meeting. Or even what the deal is with who did (and more importantly who did not) have my position before me.

fair warning

Lesson from reflections tonight.

I don't always know that I'm approaching my breaking point until I'm staring right over the edge. At that point I will give warning, probably in the form of "Do This" or "Don't Do This." It's best for everyone if you follow directions and don't push more buttons. Otherwise some sort of explosion will probably ensue.

The good news is that there are usually several explosions before major damage occurs.

The bad news is I need to learn to control this before students find my buttons.

Curing sense of isolation

Apparently it’s true. A decent cure for a sense of isolation in a new community can be to get out in the community and do stuff. In that spirit I went out a lot today. Because today I actually knew where people would be. It’s Sunday—CHURCH. I went to several services in the thoughts that the more churches I visit, the more people I meet, the more people recognize my face, and the more people who may do something to welcome me somehow. (Though sadly did not receive any dinner invitations. Alas. However, I did get a dinner at the local festival I visited between services.

Frequent conversation line. “What brought you here?”
“I’m with this program and asked for a rural placement.”
*eyes light up* “Well, you got rural all right.”

While this was normal in larger areas, it’s said in a different tone here. More lighthearted and appreciative (I hope). Much more a sense of the reality of it I’m sure.

I hope I can handle it.

Day Two (Or full Day One)

Yawn. Bedtime writing does take on a certain tone. Hopefully I’ll find a different time to write, so you don’t just get sleepy jabber.

Got things more moved in today. Mostly unpacked even. I’m not sure how it all fits, but it mostly does. I’m hoping I can move some stuff into my classroom next week (then I can rearrange stuff on my bookshelf). When Mom and Dad bring out the final things (like my sewing table which it a necessity, but I’m not sure where it will fit) I’ll probably send some books and notes back with them. But after going through high school notes and figuring out how helpful they still can be (at least when studying for Praxis exam and trying to figure out how my teachers set things up in their classrooms), there’s no way I’m getting rid of them.

Other news, I went grocery shopping. Lots and lots of groceries. Because I need to cook. I’m not sure what my housemates will think, but, yeah, need to cook. Hopefully I’ll come back later and post my move-in grocery list. It sets up kitchen well. I hope. I guess it’ll be tested soon.

Arrival

This won’t go up until I get internet access but it’s currently 9:39 my time zone. (Which means my cell phone thinks it’s 9:39 sometimes and 8:39 other times and my watch says it’s 10:39. My body just knows I’m exhausted and my brain is alternating between being zombie, being terrified, and being excited. Right now, I’m afraid the terror’s winning.

Comfort music, obviously necessary. Since I’m at the computer, I’m listening to Marion McPartland’s Piano Jazz. I’m pretty positive I won’t be able to find her on the radio here, but podcasts are amazing. Her voice is just so calming. The conversations make a comfortable background. And then the jazz plays soft and smooth.

Okay, so I’m not being eloquent right now, too many clichés and such, but I did mention the exhaustion right?

Also on the music front, a special thank you to those who made me CDs for my drive. I listened to music from all ya’ll today. Every new CD (and sometimes more like every song) feels like a hug. Just that sense that you were thinking of me at some point. Big hugs to you!

A fitting end

I love that this Frazz comic was published on my last day of institute. If it's not an appropriate summary, I don't know what is.

(click picture for a legible view)



That said, I think it's bedtime.

benefits of the phone

As annoying as it is to wait and wait and wait for a call, there are times when telephones are worth it. Like when a student actually does come for their last class of the day (despite missing mine) after I call during lunch. And when I finally (FINALLY) get to talk to people I've been trying to get to answer my questions for a week.

I like long walks....

In order to maintain sanity, take a break from work during the neverending cycle, remind myself that there is life outside of a couple of buildings and a bus, I've been taking daily walks around campus. Get back here in the afternoon, change out of the professional dress into the jeans and t-shirt (note for a later post, my wardrobe balance), and go OUTSIDE!

It helps a lot. Still, I've pretty much figured out campus, at least the parts I'm comfortable exploring. I miss trails in a forest. Or on the beach. Or at the zoo's gardens. Or anywhere that's not dominated by buildings. Because they become familiar quickly and don't change with the seasons. A week and a half and then my scenery changes. Hopefully I'll get more walks in the coming year. Though maybe not quite as enthusiastic as Randall.