Moving Melancholy

There is no reason why this move should churn up emotions.

None.

I'm switching offices. We all are. It's an office switch-a-roo. I'm not saying goodbye to people.* I'm not  changing job descriptions.** I'm not even having to carry all my books myself.***

And yet, sitting beside my boxes, sorting through the papers I printed for classes, deciding what to keep and what can be recycled, there it is.

Part sadness. Part nostalgia. Part anxiety about the future and what comes next. The wondering of how things will work in the new place.

It's ridiculous. Especially when compared to other people who are actually MOVING. Friends who are moving across country for grad school. Colleagues who just bought a house. My sister texted me WHILE I WAS SITTING NEXT TO THESE BOXES saying that she'd just left the house where she's spent the past year. For the last time. My switch has NOTHING on them.

But sometimes you have to embrace the ridiculous to get past it. Acknowledge that this comes from years of past moves, stress about not getting as much done as I feel like I should, and the reminder that relationships are changing all the time.

So I'm heading home early today. Stopping by early tomorrow so I can get to my plants before the movers do. And counting on the excitement of unpacking to be as refreshing as the current mood is draining.







*At least not people who I couldn't stop by and say hello to on pretty much any workday.

** Well, not any more than if I'd been in the same office anyway. And really, I'm glad to be at the point where I'm done taking classes.

*** Since it's the Grand Switch-a-roo they're getting movers. I am spoiled I tell you. Spoiled.

Second Opinions

"Are you keeping secrets from her?"

Middle schoolers are my favorite for giving a second opinions on your relationship. Or at least, they do a bang-up job of checking out your partner.

"Will you stay by her side?"

When I was back for graduation, my friend showed me a video of her middle school students interviewing her fiance. They bounce back and forth between "What are your intentions?" and "What is her favorite color?" Both important questions when you think about it.

"Will you buy her anything she wants?"

So when I realized List Guy was going to meet one of my best friends while she had two middle schoolers living with her, I asked them to check him out for me. My friend looked over their list first and apparently vetoed some questions that were too straight-from-a-tv-wedding-ceremony. Though, they were still awfully concerned about my material well being.

"Do have a house, a car, and money?"

 A lot of the questions have obvious "right" answers. But they're still the questions that people want the answers to. We're just "too polite" to actually ask them.

"What do you like about her?"

Or at least to ask them of our friend's new partner. We ask our friend what they like about the new person in their life. Much less likely to ask the new partner.

"What are you good at?"

The friend who introduced me to the middle-school second opinion system let her kids be on their own with her partner.  She got the video tape in the end.

"What would you change about him?" "If you changed all of him, what would you change back?"


We didn't have a proper camera. Nor did we really have another place for me to go in my friend's apartment building, so I was sitting beside List Guy for his interview. It was one of the most adorable feeling moments we've had together.


"Do you smoke or drink?"


I hope we didn't make my friend gag. Maybe that's the other reason these the middle schoolers are better at these interviews. We like a bit of other people's romance in the movies. Too much from our friends quickly gets to be Too Much. Middle school is more of a time of watching others' relationships in books and movies and real-life as you dreaming what your future relationships will be.


"Do you trust her?"

And really, only an interview by middle-schoolers can end with an on-demand  talent show to prove that you didn't lie earlier.

The first time I served as skipper...

15 knot winds. 4 to 5 foot waves. 

And I rocked it. Neither my partner nor I had ever been sailing before. The instructors weren't on our boat. We kept asking each other what in the world we were supposed to do. Strategizing before action does not work as well when you're already moving. Not being able to relate theory to practice until you do things is confusing. Not gonna lie, there was unintentional tacking. But we didn't run into anyone. And the only time we capsized was when we were instructed to.

22. Go sailing--Check!